


Built on Ruins

by Nightly_Refrain



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angel Wings, F/M, Hurt Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV), Hurt/Comfort, Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) Needs A Hug, S2 events in Hell as backstory, Wings, alt canon, amenadiel never starts sleeping with maze and also doesn't bring malcolm back from the dead, i like to break canon down into essential parts and throw away what i dont like, it changes things, non-canon angel siblings, recovering from too much family time, recovery from hell, somehow we ended up starting sort of like S3 and S5?, sort of lik an extended season 1/2 vibe, then amenadiel forces him back to hell, then put it back together as i see fit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-17 03:48:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29465277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightly_Refrain/pseuds/Nightly_Refrain
Summary: When Lucifer and Chloe are reunited in the LA after Lucifer’s been missing for a year due to being forced back to Hell by Amenadiel, they both finally feel like they can breathe again.Lucifer just wants to move past his time spent in Hell and get back to business as usual, but it isn’t easy as he hoped.
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar, Trixie Espinoza & Lucifer Morningstar
Comments: 7
Kudos: 25





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title comes from the quote: 
> 
> Rome is built on ruins  
> and is quite breathtaking;  
> what makes you think  
> you can’t be too?

When Lucifer stepped through the rift created by the specially forged shears and onto the cracked ground of an Earthly desert, he was nearly knocked over by the feeling of relief that he was finally home. How long had it been, since Amenadiel forced him back down to Hell? Since he set Lux on fire and nearly killed Maze? Since Lucifer returned and found his mother free?

Tension wound its way back up his spine as his mother followed him through. She looked around in triumph as they left Hell behind, the rift shrinking on its own until it vanished. The few flakes of ash that had blown through soon mixed with sand and dirt, until they were indistinguishable from their surroundings.

“We did it, Lucifer,” his mother said, confidence and victory easy in her mouth.

“So it seems,” Lucifer acknowledged, knowing that this was the simplest part of his plan and that the hard part was still to come.

He looked at her sidelong, taking advantage of her momentary distraction at the view of something besides Hell for the first time since she was locked in her cage. She’d caught glimpses of Earth in Hell loops, primarily through his own when she felt he deserved a time out, and before she was caged, but it was different in person.

To non-humans, Hell loops always had an air of falsehood to them, a feel that you were on a set even if you couldn’t see that you were. Lucifer closed his eyes to savor the spin of the Earth beneath him, the lack of ash in the air, the sunlight on his face, the wind in his hair—the feeling of being part of life again.

There was no comparison.

It wouldn’t last long though, not for a being such as his mother and not as she is now. Even before Hell, she never set foot on Earth if she could help it. So, however welcome the sight was after, it was still a far cry from the Silver City she built. The Silver City she would always consider home. The body he forged for her in the bowels of Hell at her request to help pressure and rebuild her power was littered with cracks, her divine light bleeding through. He wasn’t sure whether it said more about Death Valley or his mother’s light that it was unclear which was more punishing.

Was it the light that made him reconsider his decision to try to talk her out of her plan one last time? The reminder that for all he was his father’s, he was hers too. Her light shined in him; it was from her—not his father—that he got most of his light bringer abilities. “Mother, I’ve brought you this far. Won’t you consider going the last bit on your own?”

“Lucifer, my son,” she puts her hands on his shoulders. “I thought you gave up all this talk about staying on Earth,” his mother’s voice was soft, cajoling, but condescending, as though he continued to want something that was bad for him and that he was too naïve to know see it. “You belong in our home, with your family—not here among these lowly humans.”

“The Silver City stopped being my home long before I was thrown from its heights,” Lucifer said, the hellfire on the shears he’d created guttering slightly at his upheaval of emotion. “I want to move forward, not go back. I want to stay on Earth.”

“Lucifer, you are too good for this world,” his mother said, waving her hand distastefully at the sand and scrub around them. “We need to go to the Silver City and reclaim our home. We need to fight for it and make it ours once more. We deserve vengeance against your father for what he has done to us.”

“I don’t want vengeance,” Lucifer couldn’t help the pleading that entered into his voice, too desperate to have just one parent who listened to what he wanted when he voiced it. “I just want to live my own life—to be left alone and out of his games and schemes and plans.”

“Don’t you see?” she replied. His mother lifted her hand to cup his cheek. “He will never allow that. That is why we need to go there, with the weapon and put a stop to him, once and for all.”

“Waring with this,” Lucifer shook the shears, “will only cause destruction.” Why did she think he had created shears and not a sword? Sure, he told her that was the only way to cut between worlds without the flaming sword, but it was because he wanted to make a tool and not a weapon that she could misuse.

“Sometimes destruction is needed to build anew,” his mother replied. “I know you’ve never understood that because you were made to create, but it is the way of things. That is why we both need to go. I need to tear him down and you need to help me rebuild our family. Why else do you think he worked so hard to drive a wedge between us? We can win this, especially if you help me convince your siblings to join us. We are stronger than him, if we unite.”

“You truly think my presence at your side will help convince the others?” Lucifer asked, his voice colored with dubious disbelief. “They didn’t listen to me the last time—no one did.”

“Ah, however this time, I am on your side,” his mother reminded him, as if he could ever forget her indifference when he was thrown from the Silver City’s heights by his own twin brother at his father’s command. “No more of this delaying, son. Cut our way home,” she commanded, her voice strong and then an edge entered it, “Or I will take the shears and do it myself.”

“Very well, Mum. If this is how it has to be,” Lucifer said reluctantly, raising his arms. He narrowed his eyes, cutting carefully and deliberately. Silver light began bleeding through, a cool breeze carrying with it a distant song, as the opening widened.

His mother’s eyes glittered as she beheld the home she had built for her family for the first time in millennia and he knew she wouldn’t be distracted for long.

“I’m sorry that it has to be this way,” Lucifer said, his voice heavy with regret. With a snap he broke the shears in half, separating the two blades from each other. For a second he held two flaming blades before both blew out, leaving behind only scraps of metal. Lucifer put the hell forged blade in his pocket and threw the steel half tempered in his mother’s divine light and heat through the opening he’d created to the Silver City.

“What did you do?!” his mother screamed. “We needed that in order to fight!”

“No, I will not cause the death of any of my siblings,” Lucifer replied, hellfire warming his eyes as he spoke. “And I’ve told you, Earth is my home. You’re welcome to the Silver City though—you and Dad deserve each other,” there was a vicious twist to his mouth as he practically spat the words at her, relived to finally be able to speak freely since he first found her on his throne. “Neither of you knows how to listen, how to put the needs of your children over your own. I didn’t even realize how selfish you both were until I lived here and saw how real parents are supposed to act.

“I got you out of Hell and I opened the door home,” Lucifer said before holding up a hand, “but I refuse to go with you and I refuse to let you endanger anyone here. The only way forward is through—so go.”

“Not without you, you’re my son,” his mother’s voice was deadly in her fury and the cracks she sported grew wider. She reached out for him, grasping his shoulders tightly, her light searing into him. “And you will come with me. We are going to do this together.”

“No, we’re not.” Lucifer grabbed her, and began forcing her back.

“Yes, we are,” she replied, furious he was still physically stronger than her. “Why are you fighting me?”

He had her through the door, his hands burned from where they came in contact with her light, his physical form unable to withstand pure divine pressurized energy. He ignored the pain as he pressed her closer and closer. She latched onto him with a wiry strength he didn’t expect and was now trying to pull him after her through the slowly shrinking gateway.

“Because I made my choice.” Lucifer managed to take advantage of the momentary weakness of her disintegrating form, pulling her hands from him. He pulled her slightly closer by them and then flung her bodily away from the doorway and stepped back. “Goodbye, Mum.”

“Lucifer!” she screamed as her divine light splintered her form and she rushed towards him, but it was too late. The rift was closed and they were on opposite sides.

Lucifer tried to catch his breath as he studied his hands as they were the only parts of him that had direct contact with his mother and had suffered the most from her divine light. They were a vivid red and stung in a way that suggested it was probably a bad sign they didn’t hurt more. Uncontrolled divine light like his mother’s, which she had only recently been able to rebuild up to any semblance of her former power, was just as damaging as celestial or infernal weapons.

Ironic that he was the one who had crafted the body which allowed her to pressurize and regain the powers his father, with a few key siblings, had worked hard to strip her of. And it’s first use had been to hurt him.

Ironic for the Light Bringer, ruler of Hell, to be so burned.

He shrugged, looking away and letting his hands fall to his sides—it wasn’t as though he didn’t have practice ignoring burns or pain. It wasn’t as though he hadn’t expected it, knowing she wouldn’t go quietly, and now he needed to figure out his next move.

He was just lucky that it would take her longer still to regain the ability to move between dimensions—something she had never been particularly interested in or skilled at. The advantage to time moving faster in the Silver City, inverse of its slower speed in Hell, was that hopefully he’d be able to enjoy a century or two on Earth before she could come back to take it out on him.

As long as none of his siblings helped her, of course. Angels were designed to move between dimensions—easiest way to follow Dad’s orders.

Speaking of siblings, there was the woosh of feathers behind him and Lucifer turned to find Amenadiel glowering at him. Well, he’d hoped to have a bit more time than that.

“Brother!” Lucifer said with false joy, automatically concealing his hands behind him: angels, demons—they all exploited any weakness. “I’d say it’s good to see you, but well, you know how I feel about lying.”

“Lucifer,” Amenadiel intoned, seeking his usual refuge behind a façade of implacability. “How did you get to Earth?”

“The tool Mum and I were making, designed to cut through the fabric of the world?” Lucifer suggested. He furrowed his brow in mock confusion, “Don’t tell me you’ve already forgotten.”

Predictably, Amenadiel scowled, “Of course I haven’t! I remember telling you to only pretend to comply while I talked to Father in order to determine our next move.”

“Yes well,” Lucifer shrugged. He rolled his eyes just as he had the first time Amenadiel suggested it. “Not lying and being brilliant did make the task rather challenging, so I came up with my own plan.”

“You did what?!” Amenadiel took a menacing step forward.

“My. Own. Plan,” Lucifer replied, straightening under the disapproving and furious look Amenadiel was sending him. “Neither you nor Mum were really presenting good options.”

Lucifer went to hold up a hand, only remembering last minute to turn his palm towards himself so Amenadiel couldn’t see what Mum had done to his hands. “You wanted me to keep Mum busy in Hell while trying to get a straight answer from Dad—even knowing the selfish bastard never tells anybody anything and hasn’t for millennia. You were probably hoping he’d tell you to lock her back up, but perhaps with visiting hours and with me back on that awful throne.

Lucifer held up his other hand, also keeping the palm facing himself, for all he refused to look at them. They no longer hurt, which was definitely an extremely bad sign he couldn’t think about while facing Amenadiel down. “Mum wanted us both to go back to the Heaven, recruit all our other siblings, and kill Dad—or some other similar nonsense. Both plans landed me in Hell—regardless of which realm I actually ended up in.”

“What did you do?” Amenadiel asked, needing to know so he could decide just how angry he should be.

“Made the shears and told Mum I had to make a stop on Earth. Once here, I opened a portal to the Silver City. Threw Mum and half the shears through,” he grinned with all his teeth as he met Amenadiel’s disbelieving eyes. His shoulders twitched as he aborted the move to spread his injured hands out to show his brother what he’d done. “And now, look at you, you’re all caught up.

“I’m back on Earth where I want to be and Mum even got to go home like she wanted,” his pleased tone darkened as he continued. “If Dad wants her back in her cell, he can bloody well send her there himself. If he wants me back in Hell, same thing. Personally, I hope they tear each other to pieces, but I’ve decided I don’t care as long as they leave me out of it.”

“How could you do something so foolish?” Amenadiel demanded. Then he barked a dismissive laugh, “Never mind. I know exactly how. Just when I think you’ve matured even slightly, that you could maybe handle something on your own for once in your life, take some responsibility—you do something like this.”

“The part you’re missing is that it’s _not_ my bloody responsibility,” Lucifer hissed, beyond fed up with Amenadiel’s condescending attitude. “I’m my own man and Mum or Dad or Hell are not my duty or my responsibility. They are my punishment and as I told you however long ago—I quit. Count me out. I’m done.”

“You don’t get to make that decision,” Amenadiel replied. “How could you be so short-sighted? As if a war between Mother and Father, likely involving our siblings, wouldn’t involve you.”

“I thought you wanted a war,” Lucifer said spitefully. His eyes cut to Amenadiel, sizing him up. “Or is that only against me, without my wings? You’ve always loved a sure fight. Too bad our deal still hasn’t expired. You may have been able to force me back to Hell before, but you can’t anymore.”

“Oh Luci,” Amenadiel said, a smirk blooming across his face. “This is what I meant about short-sightedness. What exactly is stopping me from going down to Hell and finishing what I started with your pet demon?”

Lucifer’s eyes narrowed and hellfire bloomed to life within. His hands were fists at his side and he didn’t feel an ounce of pain. Lucifer took a step forward, “You will not touch her ever again.”

Amenadiel leaned forward, “Who is going to stop me?”

“I am,” Lucifer’s eyes brightened. “I already have, brother. Don’t you see?” his voice turned honeyed and smooth, grateful that he really did seem to be one step ahead for once in his existence. “As if I would leave Hell unprotected. It might not be my job, but I can take some responsibility when I feel like it. I don’t want Earth overrun with demons or miserable awful humans escaping their punishments.” He rolled his shoulders casually, an old habit from when he still had wings to call on to aid him in his battles, but his teeth seemed sharper than usual, “So I set Mazikeen up as regent in my absence. Fixed the barrier too. Have fun trying to get through it now.”

“You think you can keep me out of Hell?” Amenadiel actually sounded like he was going to laugh. “After all these years, what makes you suddenly think you have the ability to do that? Especially without your wings.”

“You do know I’ve never actually tried to keep you out of Hell before, right?” Lucifer asked, intrigued. Had Amenadiel had trouble getting into Hell in the past? He never seemed to come further than just inside or to drop Lucifer high on his throne. Even his visits recently, when they discussed Mum had been rather short, but Lucifer had thought it was just because Amenadiel didn’t want to be there. Maybe that’s why it had been easier than he expected to set the barrier to exclude him. “Give it a try, dear brother.”

Amenadiel gave him a superior look, “I think I will, just so I can demonstrate to you the foolishness of your actions. You won’t look so smug when I break your favorite toy again.”

Lucifer’s face darkened at his brother’s way of speaking about Maze, but before he could reply, Amenadiel had spread his wings and was gone.

Lucifer slumped slightly once he was sure Amenadiel was gone and tried to distract himself from his nervousness over whether or not his changes to the barrier around Hell would hold. He licked his lips absently, glancing up at the sun and briefly wondering if perhaps he had overdone it with the heat, it really was quite oppressive. Even his celestial constitution was suffering under its blistering gaze.

Speaking of blisters, he slowly and painfully uncurled his fists. He was unable to keep from looking at his palms, which were enflamed and bleeding now. In fact, he could feel a few scattered spots across his body where Mum’s leaking light must have touched him.

When they had first landed back in Hell and found she’d taken his command, he’d been more than content to leave her to it—especially if it kept her distracted. However, after she’d sought to remove his ban on demonic possession in order to get back at his father, he’d had to wrest control back from her. He’d taken to wearing infernal armor when out in public, unable to show any weakness to any of his demonic citizens in case they tried to rebel once more. More than a few had decided his mother was worth her mercurial moods.

However, in preparation for their trip back to earth, he’d changed into a suit that looked as though it had come out of his closet at Lux—before Amenadiel had burned it down, of course. The fabric was not fortified in any way so there were various holes burned in it to show reddened and peeling skin. A lost cause, he thought with a sigh, the first thing he did when he regained control of his assets was going to be to buy a whole new—.

His thoughts were cut off when a large and heavy form tackled him, causing his breath to rush out of him in a surprised gasp as he landed hard on his back. A cloud of sand and dust erupted around them as Amenadiel pushed him into the ground by his shoulders, “What have you done!?”

Despite the pain from the ground digging into him and from the force of the blow, Lucifer grinned triumphantly. “Problem penetrating, Amenadiel?”

“How could you do this?” Amenadiel demanded as he threw a punch at Lucifer’s face. The Devil let it land, smiling through bloodstained teeth. Lucifer had to give his brother some credit, he did seem genuinely worried about the effect this was going to have on Hell. If only he ever listened to what Lucifer said. “Not only have you left a demon in charge, but you’ve made it so I can’t even fix your mistake!”

“Mistake?” Lucifer had given up on in convincing Amenadiel that Hell didn’t need constant monitoring or a celestial on the throne centuries ago, that his breaks weren’t causing harm to anyone’s soul, well, beyond that which was intended. Amenadiel refused to believe that his words were anything more than excuses he gave to himself to justify having a good time on Earth. Why did no one ever take him at his word? “Mistake?

“No,” Lucifer shoved up, pushing Amenadiel off. “The mistake was ever thinking you would listen to me.” He’d ruled Hell for eons, since before the first human souls even showed up. He knew how it worked better than anyone, no matter what Amenadiel liked to pretend to believe. He left nothing to chance this time around, even more than when he decided to retire in the first place. Hell was a well-oiled machine at this point and he had no illusions when it came to it or Maze, not after all they’d been through. “Mazikeen will ensure Hell runs smoothly—I trust her, far more than I trust you. Who do you think that says more about? Her? Me? Or you?”

“You!” Amenadiel whipped at Lucifer with his bladed primaries and then kicked out his knee. He grabbed Lucifer by his shirt, sneering in his face. “Only a fool would trust a demon, especially over their brother.”

“My demon punishes those who deserve it,” Lucifer said and Amenadiel made to hit him for the implication that Amenadiel didn’t. Lucifer caught his fist, but he also couldn’t conceal his flinch at the sudden flare pain it caused his hands.

Quicker than Lucifer expected, Amenadiel grasped him by the wrist and caught sight of the ruined flesh that used to be his palms. “Brother, Light Bringer, I didn’t think you could get burned.”

Lucifer snarled and his face changed instantly, ruined red flesh revealed. It was Amenadiel’s turn to flinch, never having grown accustomed to his brother’s other face since he brought it out so infrequently around him. He released Lucifer’s wrist like he was the one who had been burned and Lucifer took advantage of the opening to kick him squarely in the chest, sending Amenadiel stumbling back several yards. “I have always been susceptible to burning. It seems the only thing our parents agree on.”

“Nonsense, I’m sure they both also agree you’re nothing, but a disappointment,” Amenadiel bit back. “You were to be the brightest of us and look where you’ve fallen.” He lunged at Lucifer and they ended up grappling, faces fixed in fury.

“Of course, another thing I seem to be so good at,” Lucifer replied, sweeping Amenadiel’s leg only for his brother to pull him down after him and send him flying off him over his head. When Lucifer picked himself up again, his devil face had once again been replaced with his angelic one. His eyes were manic as he wiped blood from the corner of his mouth, “I wonder, can it even be called a fall when one has been pushed?”

“And there you go, shifting the blame. When will you ever get over your pride, brother? When will you just admit to being wrong for once in your existence?”

Lucifer laughed and it was a cruel, desperate sound. This was all just too much. He’d felt like he’d was being slowly pulled apart at the seams ever since Amenadiel had burned Lux and broken Maze in order to force Lucifer back to Hell. Since Mum, since quelling demonic uprisings, since his mother’s punishments of him every time she was displeased, since he’d hoped for Amenadiel’s help only to lose it. “I have been wrong many, many times, Amenadiel. But about Father? About deserving free will? No. On that, I know what I’ve always known. That I am in the right.”

Amenadiel gave a wordless cry at his audacity, at his blasphemy, and threw himself at his arrogant brother with all his might and all his speed. Lucifer fell heavily to the ground and he was reminded of when he had burned his wings. The burns left by his mother screamed in agony as he laughed while Amenadiel rained down blow after blow. Even his back, where he knew there was no burns was feeling the pain as he was ground into the rocks beneath him. “Shouldn’t you be headed home, brother? No telling what sort of mess is waiting for you to clean up there.”

Amenadiel knew it was true and yet he raged at how ineffectual he was at punishing Lucifer for what he’d done, the damage he caused, just as he had the first time. He wasn’t built for this, not like Lucifer was. So he decided, for once, to sink down to Lucifer’s level. He stood up and Lucifer remained on the ground grinning up at him under the fresh bruises blossoming on his face. It wasn’t enough. Lucifer had to pay.

His eyes landed on Lucifer’s hands and he felt his gaze sharpen, even as Lucifer lost some of his confidence. “Yes, I have more important things to deal with than you.” Lucifer scoffed, even as some of the strange tension he’d just been feeling at Amenadiel’s look had dissipated slightly. 

That’s when Amenadiel struck, he jumped and landed perfectly, one booted foot on each of Lucifer’s hands. “Let me leave you with the only punishment you’ll manage to feel. Good luck playing now.” He pressed his weight down and Lucifer screamed as his burned hands were crushed utterly under Amenadiel’s focused power.

Then he vanished, leaving Lucifer in the sand, alone. Lucifer abruptly felt all his injuries at once, adrenaline from the threat vanishing so quickly he would have fallen if he’d still been standing. He curled around himself, burned skin pulling, bruises throbbing, and through it all his hands screaming in pain. Every part of him hurt.

Here he was, back on earth where he wanted to be, Maze protected, his mother banished, his brother maybe finally leaving him alone and he couldn’t even savor it. His mind flickered as he tried to convince himself this wasn’t another Hell loop punishment, as he tried to convince himself that this time, this time, he would get to stay where he wanted to be.

He wondered what it said that it tasted like a lie in his mind. He just wanted the power to live his life as he wished without interference from anyone. Why was that so hard to achieve? What was the point of it all if he never could be truly free?

He almost didn’t notice at first when the pain from his back started to ache more fiercely than his hands. By the time his wings erupted from his shoulder blades, he was nearly numb to it all. Blood dripping down his back, he welcomed the darkness behind his eyelids with relief.

Maybe it would all finally just stop.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate time changes - been more than an hour behind all day somehow.

Chloe frowned as the lights flickered. She’d thought the hospital had generators, but she supposed the blackouts really were affecting the whole city. Likely, the power needed to go out completely for those to fully kick on.

She shuffled the paper bag of desserts around to glance at her phone, checking Detective Jansen’s text. A recent transfer from another precinct, Detective Jansen was someone she’d been partnered with more often than the others the past year, despite her permanently unassigned status. Jansen was easy to work with, so when the woman had gotten hurt chasing a suspect down a fire escape, Chloe had been happy to volunteer to visit her and bring the desserts and card from the rest of Homicide.

If only Chloe could actually find her hospital room. The fact that Jansen was clearly on some heavy painkillers when she sent the message was definitely not helping Chloe interpret it. She'd followed the text's instructions, or so she'd thought, but this looked like the burn treatment section of the hospital. The accident might have happened on a fire escape, but Jansen was recovering from spinal surgery, not burns.

Chloe sighed, she should probably try to figure out where the nearest nurse’s station was because the room she had just looked into was empty—no personal effects either, so it couldn’t be the right room even if Jansen had been taken away for some sort of procedure. Maybe she’d meant to type 204 instead of 504?

Just then the lights gave a final flicker and the hallway was plunged into darkness.

A small cry, like a yelp, came from behind the door of a room she was just passing. She automatically stopped, the sound pulling on her heartstrings. Chloe listened harder and heard the sound of someone moving around, followed by a whimper. Her mom instincts kicked in as she took a step closer to the door. Was there a kid there who was scared the lights had gone out?

Emergency lights turned on in the hallway, but there was no sign of light through the window in the door to the patient’s room.

A metal clang followed by another sound of distress had her turning the knob of the door, ready to offer assistance to whoever might be inside. “Hello?”

She squinted, trying to see into the room, but since it had no windows to the outside, the room was pitch black. The lights from the hall were spaced out sparsely and the red glow was unlikely to help calm anyone down who might see her backlit silhouette in their doorway.

Chloe fumbled for her phone, letting the screen light come on, before turning on the flashlight. She blinked rapidly at the sudden brightness and turned toward the far corner of the room where she heard panicked breathing.

She slowly panned the light over, not wanting to overwhelm whoever it was, “Hello? I’m sure the lights will be back on soon.” The light fell in front of a curled up figure in the corner. Knees up, arms tight around them, dark head down, the man was rocking slightly. He had one bandaged hand near his face and was opening and closing it slowly, staring at it as his breath continued to race and trip over itself.

He did seem to move his gaze from his hand to the light now that it was there, some tension bleeding out of him. Chloe took a few careful and slow steps closer, lowering her bag gently to the ground, “Hey, can I do something to help you?”

He had stopped rocking and was just staring at where her light fell on the floor. In fact, he was still as a statue. Chloe would have wanted to check his breathing except she could still hear the ragged pull of air into his lungs. How was he even doing that while keeping so still?

Whoever this was, he was clearly very traumatized, although from the light thrown from her phone, she didn’t see any evidence of the burns she expected to see given where in the hospital they were. She supposed his hands were bandaged, but given the way he moved them, they certainly didn’t seem to be causing him any pain.

Acting on instinct, she knelt on the floor a few feet away, trying to seem as unintimidating as possible. “Are you alright?” Chloe kept her voice soft and gentle, the one she used when Trixie was upset, as Chloe found she desperately wanted to comfort the figure in front of her.

Slowly, so slowly, his head rose. Deep, wide, dark eyes met hers and she felt a jolt go through her. She blinked as she tried to take the man’s face in. Curly hair, a few days worth of growth of a dark beard, the fathomless, almost feral gaze. She felt another jolt of, of familiarity, go through her. But it was wrong, all wrong. The hair too long, the complexion too pale, the eyes… too frightened. He should never look this unkempt, this scared.

Lucifer should never look like this.

Lucifer.

Her mouth fell open. “Lucifer?” Her voice was shaky and scared, but his face seemed to solidify in front of her and she recognized her partner. Her missing partner. “ _Lucifer_.”

The blank, terror blinded eyes blinked, once, then twice. Fear receded, receded just enough for some recognition to creep in. He opened his mouth, confusion and distress painted across his face, pushing aside more of the fear. Abruptly his arms loosened their grip on his legs, his knees falling to the floor as he knelt forward ever so slightly.

Chloe sucked in a breath at the way his head tilted to the side as he studied her. One hand reached out, cautiously, fearfully. As if worried that if he touched her, she’d vanish. Chloe echoed the sentiment. The moment had a feeling of unreality to it.

His hand stopped before he could touch her and he made another noise, at the back of his throat. Then a raspy, almost cough, escaped him before his voice, rougher than she’d ever heard it, said, “Detective?” He sounded disbelieving and weak and like his vocal cords had been treated with sandpaper, but his familiar cadence, his accent, still bled through.

“Lucifer!” Chloe dropped her phone, the light swinging around wildly, and threw herself at him, arms around his neck. He was wonderfully warm and solid as she crashed into him, his arms wrapping around her automatically.

She clung to him as he fell backwards on his heels, and then further backward. His grip on her tightened as he moved so his back was pressed tight to the wall. He brought his feet up, setting them firmly on the ground and tipping her further into the cradle of his hips, her knees falling to either side of his waist.

“Chloe,” he said desperately, his voice still torn and ragged as he buried his face against her shoulder.

“Lucifer,” she replied, with nearly as much desperation, but less fear. One hand swept up and down his back in an automatic comforting gesture, while the other buried itself in his hair as if to hold him to her. She sighed at the welcome feeling on him all around her, of the way she seemed to slot perfectly into him, at the ability to finally, finally hold him in her arms again.

A year. He’d vanished without a trace just over a year ago.

It felt like so much longer.

He began to shake around her and she felt a slight wetness dampen the skin of her shoulder, where he’d nosed away her collar. “Oh Lucifer, what happened to you?” She continued to rub his back, attempting to help release some of the hard tension that was shot through his entire body, as he made another distressed sound that made her ache.

Carefully, as though worried he was too brittle and might break at the wrong move, she began to run her fingers through his hair and to mutter comforting words, more for the sound of her voice than for their content. “Shh, shh, it’s alright. I’ve got you. It’s all going to be okay. Nothing will happen now that I’m here. Shh.”

Slowly, slowly, he began to relax. His arms didn’t loosen around her, but she felt him adjust his grip, hands splaying with less frantic worry and more to hold for the sake of it. He let out a small sigh, breath warm on her collarbone, and nuzzled closer, if at all possible.

“That’s it,” she murmured, fingers giving an appreciative scratch through his hair. “I’m not going anywhere, I swear.” As more tension and stress fled his body, she felt her own relax further into him, weight settling as they found contentment in their shared embrace.

“Chloe,” he sighed, his voice still raspy, but the most normal it had been since they’d reunited. Unexpectedly, she felt tears well up in her eyes at the sound of it, as though the reality of finding him was finally sinking in. As though now that he was settling, it was her turn to fall apart, just a little.

“I’ve been so worried about you, Lucifer,” she admitted, her voice catching as she fought to contain tears.

He tightened his grip briefly around her in response, a shuddering breath escaping his lungs. “Sorry,” he said, his voice wavering. “So sorry. Never want you to worry. Never for me.”

Her heart broken for the sorrow in his voice and she clutched him tighter. “Doesn’t matter now, does it? You’re here. You’re really home.”

“Yes,” he said, a bit of wonder in his voice. “I suppose I really am.”

Chloe wasn’t sure how long they sat there, only the light from her phone for company, as they clung to each other in the corner of a hospital room.

Eventually the lights slowly came back on around them, they felt almost intrusive after the intimacy of the darkness. Remaining tension she hadn’t realized Lucifer was still holding vanished and he sunk into her further, dozing lightly. Chloe was more than content to allow it, to continue to bask in his presence, although she couldn’t help but wonder, had Lucifer been afraid of the dark before?

Her phone buzzed and she reluctantly picked it up, turning off the light and wincing at how low the battery had gotten. It was a questioning and far more coherent text from Jansen, correcting her room number and apologizing for sending Chloe on a wild goose chase through the hospital.

Before Chloe could respond, the sound of footsteps coming down the hall, surprisingly loud and close, caught her attention. She turned her head to see a nurse walk into the room and frown. He looked at the empty bed in confusion before his eyes landed on them curled up in the corner. His eyes flew wide, “Wha…? Mr. Doe? What are you doing? You need to let her go!”

Lucifer woke from his doze at the man’s voice, but when the meaning of the words penetrated his mind, the command to let go of Chloe snapped some of the fragile contentment he’d managed to scrape together.

Before Chloe was aware of what was really happening, Lucifer was on his feet, holding her to him and growling at the other man. The noise vibrated through him and the low feral sound made the other man blanch.

Chloe squirmed in Lucifer’s grip and managed to get her feet on the ground. She reached up, placing the palm of her hand on his cheek, “Hey, hey, it’s alright. I’m not going anywhere.” She pulled his head lower, towards her, trying to look into his eyes.

The nurse took a step closer, reaching out as if to pull them apart, “Ma’am, you shouldn’t be—”

He was cut off by Lucifer’s growl increasing in volume and abruptly Chloe found herself pushed behind him.

“Don’t,” Lucifer commanded, his voice rough and deep, eyes flashing with red flames for a split second. The nurse froze instantly. “Leave us.”

“Lucifer,” Chloe said, her voice sharp, pulling his focus back to her. She stepped out from behind him, pulling his gaze down to her by her hand on his chin. She rested her other hand on his chest, pushing up until it rested over his pounding heart. “It’s okay, I’m not leaving. He can’t make me.”

His growl cut off completely, his eyes turning reverential as he stared at her, as if her presence was hitting home once more, that she was really here. His hands landed on her once again, at her shoulder and waist as he pulled her closer.

Chloe turned her head to look at the nurse, “It’s alright. Did you call him ‘Mr. Doe’?”

“I… yes.” It was clear the man was completely out of his depth. “He hasn’t spoken the entire time he’s been here, even after he woke up.” Some incredulity broke into his voice as he asked, “Do you, do you _know_ him?”

“Yes.” Chloe patted Lucifer’s chest once more and gave him an encouraging smile, before turning to face the other man. Lucifer automatically hugged her to him, her back to his front, and pressed his face to the top of her head, breathing in the scent of her.

Chloe pulled back her jacket, brandishing her badge. “My name is Chloe Decker, detective with the LAPD. My partner here has been missing for over a year.” She dug into her pocket and pulled out a rather worn passport. “Here.”

They’d never been able to find his license, but she’d kept his passport on hand knowing she might need it to prove his identity at some point. “Lucifer Morningstar is his name. How long has he been here? What happened to him?”

The nurse stared down at the passport in his hand with an increasing sense of unreality. “His name is _what_? I …” He certainly couldn’t deny that the man pictured on the passport was their patient. His eyes found their way back to the incredible sight of their catatonic patient moving and talking, all because of this woman. “He was found a couple weeks ago in Death Valley. He’s recovered miraculously from his injuries, but had been in a coma until last week.

“After he woke up,” the nurse continued, unable to stop himself, despite knowing he shouldn’t be providing this private information to the detective except given how tightly the patient was twined around her, she’d likely have received his permission. He certainly wasn’t objecting. “He still appeared to be in a dissociative state. He wasn’t responsive, wouldn’t speak, or tell us who he was, or communicate in anyway—would just eat when we gave him food and stare off into nothing. With the burns practically healed, we were going to have to move him to a psychiatric ward.”

Chloe’s breath hitched at that, she half-turned in his arms, _“Lucifer_ , what happened to you?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Lucifer said roughly into her hair. “You’re here now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is basically what came to me first, then i built the rest of the story around it, sort of. 
> 
> Hope you liked it! Let me know!
> 
> Thanks to my betas!

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was my project for NaNoWriMo 2020. I hadn't even really been planning on doing NaNo, but was seized by inspiration/motivation and went for it. Its the first year I've ever won, although it took longer than just November to finish the fic. All of its drafted, but I'm still editing and tweaking. 
> 
> Special thanks to my NaNo writing groups and my beta, Zippy. Couldn't have done it without you!
> 
> Thanks for reading and let me know what you think!


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